Let’s Be Friends

Have you ever noticed how women will say, “I like him, but only as a FRIEND.”

Don’t you hate that?

I thought about that one for a long time, and a friend of mine and I have figured out how to turn this one around. Now I always make reference to ‘making friends’ and ‘let’s get together and make friends’ and ‘if nothing else, we can be friends’ in the first conversation and when setting up the first coffee date.

Then when on the date, I talk about why I like to make ‘friends’ first to get to know the other person. “I think that you’re going to make a nice friend.”

Then, after the friendship frame is established, I flirt like hell and make sexual innuendoes and jokes. This immediately sets up the idea that I’m very in control of myself and that I’m going to JUDGE whether l want to be more than friends based on something more than JUST HER LOOKS.

This is something that a woman has most likely NEVER encountered (as you know, this is a favorite of mine).

By the way, if you talk about being friends first, it makes you remember to look past the looks and find out what kind of person you’re dealing with (If I had a dollar for every guy I know, including myself, that screwed his life up by getting too involved with a woman because she was attractive on the outside, but turned out to be a horrible person...)

You can keep up this ‘let’s be friends’ fun forever. Even after you start dating, still talk about it. It’s easy to have fun with it. You’ll see.

More Nuggets of Gold

Always end conversations, meetings, and phone calls first.

I got this idea from the book “The Rules” by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider...You remember that book that was written about how to get a man to marry you? Well, it’s a great book. But I don’t think the authors would like the reasons why I think it’s great. I take all of ‘the rules’ and turn them around. When you play the games that women often play, you will not believe the responses you’ll get.

Now, I used to be against any kind of ‘game playing’. I still don’t like lies, cheating, general dishonesty, or manipulation. BUT, when you use these things in the right way, it becomes kind of a ‘game’ that women LOVE to play. It’s strange, but women love to tease and be teased. And if you don’t take this stuff too seriously, you can have some real fun.

But, I digress... The reason to end conversations, calls, and meetings first is that it does two things: First, it says, “I’m not a needy guy, and I have things to do. I’m

busy and if you want me, you’re going to have to work to get me.”

Second, it sets up a situation where YOU are in control of the situation. If you start doing this with EVERY call, EVERY meeting, and EVERY conversation, you will be

blown away by the responses you’ll get.

You’ll have women say, “What? But we’re having so much fun...!”, “Well, when can I see you again?”, or “Don’t you like me?”

By the way, don’t take the bait when they say these things! Say, “Of course I like you, and of course I’m having fun – but I’m busy and I have things to do. So call me tomorrow and maybe I can get together with you at the end of the week.”

I LOVE THIS!!! Love it! Love it! Love it!

And women love it too. As much as you might think it’s cruel and unusual punishment, women love nothing more than to go home wondering, “Does he love me? Does he like me? Will he call me? Did he have fun?”

I know, I know... sounds too bizarre to be true, but trust me. Tease and do these things, and you’ll find that they’ll work like a charm... plus have the added bonus of

being damn fun!

***I have to insert here that I’ve given this advice to many needy man who have rejected it whole heartedly. They continue to act needy and not let women go at the

end of the night, when talking on the phone, etc. By not making themselves scarce and unusual, they make themselves valueless. Don’t make the same mistake

yourself.

Another one that I use often is ‘Don’t say caring and affectionate things directly – but say them indirectly’. Women have a love for metaphors, demonstrations,

stories, gifts, etc.

For instance, saying, “You’re beautiful” 12 times a day isn’t attractive, but writing a poem that says it and leaving it somewhere as a surprise is very attractive.

Also, if I’m appreciating something about a woman, I point to a specific part or thing or detail. Women love it when you NOTICE things.

This reminds me of a very important point: Women LOVE it when you THINK about them. If you say, “I was thinking about you, so I wrote you” the woman will have something inside go ‘click’! I believe that women like gifts not because they have value, but because they say, “I was thinking about you, I have these feelings for you, and this gift is a symbol for them.”

Does this make sense to you?

I didn’t think so. It didn’t to me, either. But IT’S TRUE. So start telling women that you were thinking about them, that you were remembering times with them, and that something reminded you of them. If you do this, you don’t have to buy gifts anymore! They know you’re thinking about them! Nice.

Here’s something else that I’ve figured out that doesn’t make any sense at all: Women love ‘Mismatched Communication’. What I mean by this is that women like it when you’re doing one thing serious and one thing jokingly, or being verbally tough, but physically affectionate.

Let me give you a couple of examples.

If you’re talking to a woman and telling her that you think she’s beautiful, keep a very SERIOUS look on your face. This adds all kinds of drama to the situation and gives the woman something to imagine all kinds of deep meanings. (By the way, most men smile too much. Smile less when talking to women. It will keep them wondering what you’re thinking and it will help you.)

Or while kissing a woman, reach down and bite her on the neck, just a tiny bit too hard (no blood please).

One thing tender, one thing slightly violent.

Or maybe you’ve just finished holding her hand and kissing her. When she stands up, give her a spank on the ass and tell her it was because she’s such a good kisser.

The idea here is that what you’re feeling is causing you to do something IRRATIONAL. You’ve being swept away by the moment. Or you’re experiencing conflicting feelings. This leaves it to her to figure out what you’re ‘REALLY’ feeling, which women love to do.

It also makes you the most interesting, unpredictable guy she’s ever met.

You know, another thing that I’ve noticed is that women LOVE to talk about sex. Most men are not comfortable bringing up the subject with women they don’t know. But try telling a couple of dirty jokes, or talking about a sex program you saw on T.V. Most women will jump right in and start giving their take on the topic. It’s amazing. Try it.

How To Get The First Meeting

First of all, I’m going to explain my mindset: I have decided that I need about 20-30 minutes to get to know a woman before I decide to invest in getting to ‘really’ know her.

I actually like women for their company, and who I’d enjoy seeing for more than just one ‘get laid’ session.

So I like to meet a woman for a cup of tea and talk for a bit, or even let that lead to a bite to eat sometimes. So my mindset is that I’M THERE TO QUALIFY THEM. Not the other way around. They pick up on this mentality and

respond accordingly.

Be Prepared! Expect

It’s funny to me that so many people expect to fail. For instance, I once heard someone say, “A woman won’t get into an unmade bed.” This is actually pretty interesting if you think about it. My point here is to encourage you to not only expect success in your mind, but also expect success in the real world.

Here are a couple of ways to expect and plan for success:

See where I’m going with this?

If you’re not prepared to have a guest, then you’re going to do all kinds of things to screw up your chances of success with women.

Right now, think of all the things you need to do so that there are NO obstacles preventing you from success in your car, house, etc.

Now let’s talk about a few ways to REALLY separate yourself from most other men.

Learn A Few Cold Reading Methods

Women love things like Astrology, Tarot Cards, Palmistry, Handwriting Analysis, Psychics, and anything else you can think of that most men aren’t interested in.

Here’s what to do:

Go get the books “Handwriting Analysis” by Karen Amend, “Palm Reading: A Little Guide To Life’s Secrets” by Dennis Fairchild. and “An Introduction to Hand Reflexology” by Denise Brown. You can order all of them at Amazon.com.

Then sit down for an evening and read them. Learn some basics about how to tell people what they’re like from studying handwriting samples, looking at their palms, feeling tension in their bodies, etc.

This stuff is ABSOLUTELY FASCINATING to women.

All you have to do is take a woman’s hand, look at it, and say, “Well, you’re a very interesting person.”

That’s it... it’s almost like magic.

After revealing to her all of her secret desires, you can move directly into your hand massage and Reflexology methods. I’m hoping that the benefits of these techniques speak for themselves.

By the way, it doesn’t hurt to know a few advanced or unusual massage moves either. So you might want to check out a couple of books on massage while you’re at it.

Thinking In Time Frames

Here’s a common problem: A man tries to impress a woman by doing things that show that he’s a good LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP kind of guy, but the woman responds by being stand-offish.

I have read some interesting research that shows that women have a few main categories in their minds in which they slot men.

These are:

Here’s the interesting part: If a woman sees a man as a good potential ‘long-term’ mate, she’ll usually hold back the sex.

On the other hand, if she gets sexually involved with a man, she’ll usually still be open to a long-term relationship.

Most men who want sex make the mistake of doing things like taking women to dinner, buying them gifts, and being romantic. This behaviour triggers the “Hey, this

guy is good long-term material” category in the woman’s mind, and they hold back sex.

But if a man does things to turn a woman on earlier in the game and she gets sexually involved, he can choose where he wants the relationship to go. Are you with me

on this one?

Go ask some men and women about this idea. They’ll report back to you what I’m telling you. Women know that if a man is doing all the big romantic things like

buying her gifts and taking her out, he is displaying ‘courtship’ types of behaviour. I mentioned earlier that women take hints very well and read into things much more than men. Unfortunately, men have no idea that their good deeds are being interpreted as long-term courtship demonstrations. Ahhhh!

So what’s the solution?

The solution is to stop doing the ‘I’m courting you’ things early on, and start by being attractive, interesting, and sexy. This puts the balance of power in your hands and puts you more in control.

I’m going to say it again: A woman will get into a long-term relationship with a man who she’s sleeping with, but she won’t be as likely to sleep with a man who’s

courting her. Get it?

Snappy Responses To Common Situations

Ever been sitting with a group of attractive women and your buddies when out of nowhere one of the women says, “You guys are lucky to be at the same table with

us.”

Well I have. So I came up with a few zingers to throw out should this happen again:

Also, quit EXPECTING to “pick up girls” and instead go make friends and give the women the opportunity to get to know you. A couple more ideas for different situations:

(The napkin almost always comes back, and the game is on... It’s fun, mysterious, and the girl always wants to know who’s playing with her. I’ve used this before, and it’s great fun. At some point, depending on whether you’re winning or losing, you can come over to her table and say something like, “Well, I had to meet my worthy opponent” or “I hope you talk better than you play”, etc.)

One of the most amazing things you can do when a woman brings up sex is to tease her about it, ask her why she’s bringing it up, and accuse her of having a dirty mind, etc. It’s great! You must realize that this is one of the very best ways to tease an attractive woman. They usually love it.  Attractive women often bring up the topic to see if you’re comfortable... or to test you to find out if you’ll get nervous or insecure.

The best thing to do in these situations is to accuse her of trying to get sexual too fast, tell her you’re not interested, and bust on her. It’s all kinds of good fun. And the added benefit is that it makes her more and more curious about you and why you don’t seem like all the other losers who roll over and act stupid.

Getting Them Interested In You

An important distinction that I’ve made which attracts women is to never act too happy.

Women are intrigued by men who are calm and almost unaffected. The real hotties are used to having men get nervous when talking to them, and they can sense that you’re different when you stay very cool and calmly talk to them.

NEVER let them sense that you’re too interested in the beginning.

I just read tonight in a book about cats that a cat will approach the person in the room that is least interested in it. Somehow, cats can detect when someone is paying no attention, which is what attracts them. WOMEN ARE THE SAME.

I know that this one doesn’t make any sense, but if you start acting uninterested, you’ll see that women will start giving you the “What’s wrong? You don’t like me?” response. Now, you may think this is manipulation, but I think of it as having fun, teasing, and being challenging. And by the way, I’ve told several women about this stuff later on after I got to know them better... and they ALL told me that it worked, and they’re glad that I did it in one way or another.

Chivalry

My experience is that women love chivalry.

I personally like to open doors for women, etc.

Here are a few things that you can do that women will find irresistible:

Open doors for them. I open all doors. Car doors, house doors, restaurant doors... any door that shows up. If you step just a little ahead and open each door, this will create an impression.

Pull out their chairs. Only do this if it makes sense and it’s reasonable. But if you can, do it. Women love to feel like a man is watching over them and making sure they are taken care of. This is another little way to show it.

Walk on the outside of the sidewalk. Most men, and even many women, don’t know that men are ‘supposed’ to walk on the outside of the sidewalk (closest to the traffic) just in case a car jumps the curb, so she’ll be safe and he’ll instead be hit. Do this, and if they don’t know why you’re doing it, explain the reason. Nice touch.

On Being A Man

There is a lot controversy around the differences between men and women. My perspective is that men and women are different in many ways and that they usually respond differently to various types of communication.

And as politically incorrect as this might sound, I believe that most women respond very strongly to ‘masculine’ men. The more confident, arrogant, and dominant I’ve acted, the more women have responded to me emotionally and sexually. (I’m not talking about hitting a woman over the head and dragging her to your cave, Bubba.)

And now that I’ve thought about it a lot and interviewed dozens of women about this topic, I’ve realized that weak men are generally not attractive to women. Women may demand things, whine, and act like a pain, but it’s usually all a test of one sort or another.

If you’re weak, shy, or submissive, get over it. Start walking a little taller, acting a little more self-centered, and taking what you want.

Now, I have to be careful here. I want to make sure you don’t start acting like an ‘asshole’ to women. The masculine man says, “No” to a woman calmly. The Asshole says, “No” to a woman in an angry tone. Get it?

Where To Meet Women

Here’s the deal: If you want to meet more women, you have to go to the places where they go.

If you like athletic women, go to the gym or spend time at the coffee shop or juice bar next to a gym.

If you like spiritual women, take yoga or meditation classes.

If you like large women, hang out at Weight Watchers.

Are you with me here?

The point is that you have to put yourself in a ‘high probability’ situation to meet women.

A sure place to find single women is bars and nightclubs. But this is also a sure place to find a lot of horny guys that are trying to pick up these women.

I’ll talk later about how to be successful in different situations, but for now I’d like you to think about where women that you’d like to meet hang out. And then start going there yourself.

A great place to meet women is ONLINE. If you need practice talking to women, invest in an AOL membership. For $23.90 a month, you can chat with women 24/7. I look at AOL as a ‘woman simulator’. You get on, start talking, and on the other end a woman simulator is there to respond to all of your conversation. It’s amazing. And the added bonus is that if a woman turns out to be interesting, you can actually meet her.

My point is simply to put on your thinking cap and ask yourself the question: “If I were the kind of woman who I’d like to meet, where would I hang out?”

Then start going to these places on different days and at different times to find when the best opportunities are.

I have a good friend that used to go to airports when flights were arriving from different places, because some of the flights were more likely to have attractive women on them.

I know one guy that loves to go to bookstores to meet women.

I know a guy that likes to go to ‘Asian Dances’ to meet women (and he’s not Asian).

Here are a few good general places: Dance lessons, gyms, bookstores, coffee shops, supermarkets, healthy food restaurants, yogurt shops, and anything near salons and beauty supply stores.

If you start paying attention, you’ll find places where women are more likely to be.

As a side note, if you live in an out-of-the-way place, and you’d like to start meeting a lot of fantastically beautiful women, you might consider a move to a big city. I’ve found the difference between big cities like New York, Chicago, L.A., etc., and small towns is dramatic. Attractive women flock to the large cities because this is where the opportunity is for them. This is also where they’re more likely to meet a rich, famous, or successful man.

I’ve been to places in big cities that had more beautiful women in one restaurant than a person living in a small town might see all year.

So think about where you live and how it relates to meeting the kind of woman or women that you’re interested in finding.

I’ve also found that many women love the fantasy of ‘accidentally’ meeting a man somewhere normal, but unexpected. This is a common female fantasy.

Women like the idea of accidental romance.

And the best part of meeting a woman in a ‘normal’ place is the fact that there are usually minimal distractions and no one else competing for her attention.

So keep this in mind when you’re out looking for potential mates.

On Cuddling

I personally love to cuddle. I discovered something almost entirely by accident one time when I was talking to a girl on the phone one night. We were having a discussion about the differences between men and women and I said something to this effect:

“Do you like to cuddle? I really like to cuddle… as a matter of fact, if I had to choose between cuddling and sex, I’d choose cuddling. Now don’t get me wrong, I love sex… but cuddling is the best… can you cuddle all night?”

Then I said, “I really like to kiss, and I can just kiss and cuddle... and touch someone all night... and feel wonderful...”

By the time I was finished, she started saying, “I’m really getting turned on right now”... she actually asked me to have phone sex with her!

I’ve had this happen on the phone several times since, and it’s not a coincidence.

When you’re talking to a woman, if you start talking about kissing, cuddling, touching... and you are very specific about it... “I like to run the tips of my fingers over the part of your shoulder where it touches your neck” ... a woman will start to actually experience it.

Try this one!

If you can learn how to talk to women in a way that stimulates their imagination, you can get them turned on over the phone.

I’m sure you can imagine the benefits of having this skill. If you don’t have any idea how to talk romantically, just read a couple of romance novels. I know that they make no sense, but use the stuff anyway. It works!

The Six Things That Attract Women

I’ve done a lot of research on this topic, and I believe that women are most attracted to these six things:

Now, numbers one through five are largely out of your immediate control. If you’re not rich, you’re probably not going to get rich this week. If you’re not famous or tall, you’re probably not going to be in a hit movie or grow 6 inches in the next 24 hours.

So that leaves us with number six: PERSONALITY.

The good news is that as far as I’m concerned, your personality is your GREATEST ASSET in the success-with-women game.

Fortunately, it’s the one thing you can change. And it’s the one thing that can OVERCOME all the rest. After you’ve done what you can to look your best, etc. you have to develop a personality that’s absolutely magnetic. Now let’s talk about how you can do just that.

By the way, the one quality that attracts women the most (and keeps them attracted) is not something that they can initially ‘look’ for. It’s the way they FEEL when they are with you or thinking of you. If you don’t have wealth, power, fame, or looks, you’re going to have to use your personality to make them FEEL good. In the end, your personality is the most powerful asset you have.

The Initial Approach

This one is simple.

I’ve tried probably 50 different types of ‘lines’ and techniques for meeting women, and I’ve found that the simple ones work the best.

If I’m in an environment that has a lot of people, and I’m with a friend, I like to start by asking a woman for her ‘opinion’ on something. Here’s how it happens… first of all, I keep my eyes open for current affairs and interesting trivia that involves gender differences and tension. This makes for amazing conversation openers with hot, intelligent women.

My latest favorite: “Hey, let me ask you a question. My friend and I were talking about something, and I think we need a female perspective…” (This is a killer, by the way. It’s taken me a long time to figure this one out… but it kicks ass). Then I say, “I was just looking on the Internet… and did you know that the average woman in America is 5’ 4”, weighs 150 pounds, and wears a size 14?”  Ohhhhhhhhhh DAMMIT...

I LOVE THIS ONE!

They usually grab the ball and take off into the conversation with just that question.

Others include, “Do you think that men understand what women really want and need?” and “What do you think of this new trend of women wanting to pay their own way… and the Charlie’s Angel’s theme song that sings about it as almost a stuck up thing to do?”

You with me here?

After starting a conversation, get into Mr. Cocky and Funny mode, and you’ll do some good work.

If I’m alone, and the woman is alone or with friends, I usually start with a compliment opener… depending on the situation.

And I always try to tie it into the situation, so it doesn’t sound canned. Women that I run into can smell canned openers… I think that they’re getting popular again or something… because women can sense them like a dog sensing kitties.

I might say, “Excuse me… <Pause pause pause for effect> I noticed you when I walked in, and I had to take a second to find out what you were like…” or something

equally plausible sounding.

What I’ve realized is… if you’re going to approach a woman, what you say doesn’t much matter as much as HOW you say it (remember the character thing?).

So keep a serious look on your face (no big cheesy smiles) as this approach creates the feeling that you’re not overly excited. Then speak with a slow, mysterious confidence.

I’ve met many men who have big problems getting past the idea of walking up to women who they don’t know and starting a conversation. In fact, I had a huge issue too when I started learning about how to deal with women. My best advice is to just go for it and keep doing it until you finally get over it.

One guy I know went to a mall one day and walked up to every woman he saw to get over his fear. He said that he felt sick in the beginning, but the fear eventually went away. And then he did it again another day, and the fear went away a little faster. And now he can walk up to any woman anywhere and start talking.

Just remember, the only power any woman has in your life is THAT WHICH YOU GIVE HER. So don’t give away any of your power. Keep your power for you.

If you are turned away by her, or you get a rude person, just move on to the next one. Persistence is the price of success.

How To Be Funny, The One Page Course

Here’s a little mini-course on how to be funny:

First, go read Comedy Writing Secrets by Melvin Helitzer. And while you’re at it, watch some good stand up comedy routines like Chris Rock, Eddie Murphy, and Robin Williams. Listen to how they use word play, double meanings, exaggeration, and misinterpretation to create humour.

It’s time to get yourself a set of standard things that you can say in some of the most common situations.

Here’s a list that I use personally and examples of instances when you can use them:

OK, there’s a list of basic things that I’ve learned regarding humour. I’d recommend that you start studying humour, read books about it, go to comedy clubs, and learn more advanced skills.

Also, start reading Maxim and Stuff magazines. Read how they always use reversal humour. This is some good funny stuff.

Humour

Here’s how I mentally approach meeting a new woman: I’m cocky and funny, I steal their lines, I tease them, and I don’t ever give them a break.

In my opinion, your most valuable asset, no matter your looks, height, age, or income – is humour.

I don’t care if you’re four feet tall and have one eye. If you can make women laugh consistently and get those good feelings flowing through them, they’ll love you.

I decided last year to start actually STUDYING comedy, as I’ve found that people (women) respond to it better than any other thing in the whole entire universe.

So I did a bunch of research on the Internet to find the best books, and I bought about 5 or 6 of them.

One book that I read called “Comedy Writing Secrets” by Melvin Helitzer made a great point. He said that the majority of humour revolves around the CHARACTER and not the jokes.

Most of the guys that I meet who want to learn to meet women are working on the ‘jokes’ in their life and not the ‘character’. I did it for about two years myself. I tried to learn all kinds of lines and B.S.

It finally dawned on me that women were not really that concerned with all of that… they wanted a particular CHARACTER. The lines didn’t matter as long as they fit in with the character. Now that I have created this CHARACTER for myself, things are all different. Women now call me. They pursue me. They want to be around me. It’s strange, magical, and weird.

So what’s the character that they want? Good question.

I have a good friend who’s the best I’ve ever seen at picking up women in bars and having sex with them that night. Now, I do better getting numbers and following up.

But this guy is just a machine. And his whole mindset towards meeting women is to be “cocky and funny” (his words). My opinion is that women are turned off by arrogant men… UNLESS… they’re DAMN FUNNY. This magic combination will attract women like Bill Clinton attracts chubby interns. I’m following in my buddy’s footsteps.

I’ll try to summarize the character that I’ve developed:

“I know that this girl is secretly trying to pick me up… I’m going to play hard to get, make fun of her, be indifferent towards her, and generally bust her balls as much as possible. I know that she loves a guy that is so sarcastic that it makes her nervous, so I’m going to really keep the heat on… and when she starts to show any interest at all on the outside, I’m going to blow her off and make her prove to me that she wants me… so I can reject her again.”

I do crazy things, like if I’m standing next to a girl at a bar, I’ll turn to her and say in a completely serious voice, “Will you PLEASE stop touching me?” And then look

them right in the eye.

Or say, “What are you doing at a bar for godsakes? Can’t you find a nice normal guy? Or are you desperate?” All with a completely straight face.

I say things that make them actually think that I’m serious, but leave a shadow of a doubt.

Here’s what I’m looking for: If they respond in an insecure way and say, “Oh, I’m sorry… I didn’t know that I was touching you”, I’ll keep it going… and say, “Well, you did. And if you’re going to keep doing it, I’d appreciate it if you’d touch a little higher.” They crack up.

If they shoot something funny back like, “Well, touchy touchy” and they know that I’m kidding, I just stay in character and say, “Yes, I don’t like being touched. So keep a foot or so between us please” and keep it going.

And yes, sometimes (not often) I’ll meet a cold one and she’ll get uptight – I just walk away.

If you’re going to do this, you have to remember to keep it going for the entire time… don’t turn into a dumb ass at the first sign of her liking you. Keep up the character, play hard to get, etc. forever!

How To Tease (How To Speak Woman)

When I first met one particular girl, I took her hand when she got into the car and held it for a few seconds... then took it away saying, “No hand holding this early”, as if it were her idea... then at lunch, I put out my hand for her to take it and then when she went to take it, I moved it before she touched me... then did it again... and again

saying, “No, really...”

Finally, after the meal was finished, I reached out for her hand, and she wouldn’t take mine because I had teased her so much. So I actually grabbed her hand and held it and massaged it. This was teasing and teasing...and when she finally gave up, I gave it to her.

Then, when I gave her a hug later on, she kissed me on the cheek or neck a couple of times, and I accused her of kissing me a lot, etc. (The idea is that she’s into me and she’s the aggressor.) One part of this is me doing something (holding her hand) and then accusing her of doing it (“no hand holding this early”).

This kind of behaviour, sending mixed messages, and flirting doesn’t really make sense to most men, but to women it’s magic.

Also, some women really get intrigued if you ‘figure them out’ early on in the game and have their number... and then just ‘laugh at how cute they are’ when they do things. This gets them all freaked out, as they feel like you’re in control, and they don’t know what to do next... like you know all the games they’re playing and won’t fall for any of their old tricks... this makes them nervous as they don’t have any POWER OR AMMO!

They love this, as men are hardly ever in control. And they secretly want someone who is. (It’s VERY important not to become the ‘friend/therapist’ with this information... and start kissing their ass! The idea is to use it to bust on them and not to be understanding.)

I also tell women early on that I think they’ll make a nice ‘friend’.

It’s funny to see how the friendship frame works with them, because this gets them thinking often for the first time, “Wow, maybe I just found a man who is smarter than me, knows my little games, and has higher standards than ME for once... and now he’s talking about being ‘just friends’! Oh no! Doesn’t he like me? Doesn’t he want me like all the other guys?” A key here is to always keep them guessing... never get too into them or they’ll get right into their old games, etc.

Another interesting observation that I’ve made is that women only understand CODE, not direct language.

Little boys tease little girls when they’re 8, and women still love it when they’re 28 and 48. I like to find something about them that they’re just a little insecure about and make fun of it in a way makes them wonder whether or not I’m serious.

The way I see it, women are like the Enigma machines that German U-boats used in World War II.

These machines were able to transmit messages to each other, but also able to change the codes they used each time. Women are much more interested in giving and getting subtle hints.

Telling a woman, “I really like you”, won’t be as effective as saying, “You really like me” in a teasing way. Do you understand?

I speak in metaphor and story, talk about feelings and longings, speak code, and try to never speak directly.

Let me give you a few more examples:

If you want to have sex with a woman, you could say, “Hey, why don’t we have sex?” Go ahead and try that one sometime and let me know how it works for you.

Or, you could try this... Next time you’re alone with a new woman, stand up, take her hand, and pull her up to her feet. Then give her a hug, let go, and sit back down. After she sits again, say, “I just wanted to hug you.” Later hug her again and cuddle with her. While cuddling, smell her neck and tell her how good she smells... and don’t stop. Within a few minutes she’ll be telling you how hot she’s getting.

Two different paths to the same outcome… It’s just that one happens to work about a hundred times better than the other.

Men like to go out hoping to ‘get laid’. Women like the idea of being swept away by the moment… especially when it’s a taboo thing and they shouldn’t be doing it, etc. The more unplanned things seem, the better. For instance, if she happens to wind up in your bedroom and you happen to be massaging her, smelling her, etc. it’s seen as ‘meant to be’ or something that happened in an unplanned romantic way, and therefore a good thing to get swept away by.

If you want to increase your chances of success with women, create scenarios that lead to these situations. Ask yourself, “What situation would facilitate the outcome

that I’m looking for naturally?” Remember that women like to be swept away by the moment; they don’t like to think that they’re being used.

Another fun thing I do to demonstrate to women that I’m savvy and know the language is to interpret gestures and expressions and then comment back as if they had

said something.

So for instance, if a woman looks at someone walking by, then wrinkles up her nose and gets that ‘Gross’ look on her face, I might respond with, “That’s what I was

thinking.”

Get it? I’m pretending like she actually said, “Gross” to me.

Or if a woman takes my hand, I might say, “Oh, really?”

I’m pretending like she said, “I’m attracted to you.”

Women are very expressive with their body language and facial expressions, but they often express themselves in very subtle ways.

If you can tune into these little cues and then respond with fun remarks that show you’re clued in, you’ll be rewarded. (Notice: Do not start ACTING like a woman now that you know this tip. This technique is to be used sparingly and only to let a woman ‘know that you know’ and not as your main approach when interacting with women. Many men make the mistake of learning how women act and then IMITATING them all the time. This is not what you want to do, trust me.)

The Very Attractive Women Are Approached All The Time

I’m going to remind you of something that I talked about earlier in this book: Most attractive women are approached in one way or another all the time by men.

I was watching one of Chris Rock’s stand up routines recently; Chris was telling the women in the audience that anytime a man is being nice, it’s because he’s offering sex (or ‘dick’ as he put it).

So if a guy says, “Wow, you look great!”, what he really means is, “Wow, you really look great, would you like some dick?”

And remember that ‘desirable’ women including rich women, beautiful women, and famous women, are used to being treated like queens. (It’s really no fault of theirs; even very handsome men are notorious for acting arrogant. It’s part of being human. We can all become spoiled easily if the right combination of circumstances arises. By the way, it’s good to keep a “You’re spoiled, and I don’t really blame you for it... you were just lucky to be born beautiful and have everyone kiss your ass” attitude...)

Being spoiled, these women act bratty to get their way. However, the ass kissing and always getting their way also has another effect. Since they are so used to being courted and having a man kiss their ass, when you show up, act funny and charming, and don’t play into any of their games (make fun of them, do the pretend ass-

kisser imitation, tell them that they want you, tease them, don’t answer ANY of their questions about job, car, home, social life, where you go, etc. and even label all of

those questions as, “Did you get a list of these questions like all the other shallow women around here?” etc.) it often has the effect of them thinking, “Wow, this is sure

DIFFERENT”, which gets their attention. The humour and arrogance (arrogance based on self-knowing, not on outer success) keeps their attention.

I think that it’s all about interrupting the current train of thought with some type of DIFFERENT AND INTERESTING behaviour. You can use tricks, props, or whatever, but you have to interrupt the woman and first get her attention... then you can get to the good part of doing the things that give her the FEELINGS that she wants and playing the part of the MAN that her unconscious wants.

Many experts talk of establishing rapport, acting like them, etc. initially... I’ve found that breaking rapport usually works better for me. (Rapport is the concept of breathing, moving, and talking like another person so they feel a connection with you.)

But it’s a special kind of breaking rapport that I practice. I break rapport in a funny and charming way, which actually ASSUMES rapport from the beginning. (I insult women that I don’t know in a playful way all the time. Her only real choices with which to respond internally and externally are, “This guy is a jerk - I’m outta here” or “You’ve got some balls - but you’re damn funny - and for some reason, I feel like I know you...”)

When you point out a woman’s quirks or insecurities in a way that makes her laugh, you do so many positive things at once. She can’t deny that the things you’re saying are true, BECAUSE SHE’S LAUGHING. And she can’t really hate you too much, because it’s kind of fun.

Where And How To Meet Women

I intuitively determined that there are certain major steps to ‘meeting women’, if you will. This is how my mind naturally thinks.

I’ve now broken these down in my mind to chunks like ‘Approaching Women’, ‘Getting Phone Numbers’, etc. which I’ll explain here and in future chapters.

I’d like to add here that different people have different personal views regarding meeting women, ‘getting laid’, relationships, etc.

I’m not going to try to convince you that my way is the best, but I’ll share some of my personal values with you. When I’m in a ‘relationship’ with a woman and we’ve agreed to be ‘exclusive’, then I’m faithful to that woman.

If I’m single, then I date whoever I want, whenever I want, and have no problems or hang ups with sex, seeing more than one woman at a time, etc. Some people see things differently, which is fine, but I wanted you to know where I was coming from on this issue.

By the way, the things that I’m sharing with you work whether you’re just meeting a woman or if you’ve known her for years... or even if you’ve been married forever.

And contrary to what many men think, women usually love it that you’ve taken the time to learn things like what I’m teaching you. It makes things more fun and interesting for them.

Your Enemies Are Insecurity and Neediness

Insecurity and neediness are two of the biggest obstacles to success with women. Insecurity and neediness are like hemlock and arsenic – either will kill your attractiveness when dealing with women.

A man is needy when he craves attention or recognition. He shows that he’s insecure when he ACTS on these needs.

Insecurity shows up when a man does not feel comfortable with who he is or comfortable in a given situation. He acts tentative, weak, and unsure. He tries to put on a show of confidence which is obviously fake. He says things that are out of place in an attempt to get approval.

Women detect insecurity and neediness INSTANTLY.

Here are some examples of insecurity and neediness to avoid:

Hanging on a woman. Don’t touch a woman or crowd her too much in the beginning. Women take it as a sign of neediness and insecurity. Instead, lean back and let her become comfortable being around you. Talking or saying negative things about women or past girlfriends. If you talk too much about past girlfriends or other women, or say negative things about them, a woman will judge you to be insecure. Having emotional responses to things. If it’s obvious to a woman that you easily get upset about things, then she will judge you to be insecure. Looking to others to make decisions. Women like it when you decide what’s going to happen and then do it. If you are always asking, “Well, what do you think I should do?”, “Where do you want to go tonight?”, and “What do you want?”, you’ll come off as needy. Just make decisions and go with it. If she has a different idea, she’ll let you know. Saying or doing things just to be noticed or to get compliments. I’ve known a lot of men who try to act cool or show off to get attention. This approach telegraphs to a woman that you’re insecure and needy. Don’t do it. If you’re cool, she’ll figure it out without you telling her. Arguing. This is my favorite. Some people feel like they need to argue with EVERYTHING. If you’re one of these people, just realize that this is a clear demonstration that you’re insecure and needy. You may always be right, but being overly argumentative is bad for your sex life. Deal with it. If you really want to argue with something, do it in a funny way and not in a serious way.